Have You Eliminated Submission from Your Life?
The wisdom of living under authority
Who do you submit to? Do you have anyone in your life who has the authority to deny you something you want?
Most of us spend our lives trying to move beyond such a lowly position. We go to school, hoping to one day graduate from the tyranny of assignments and due dates. We turn eighteen and immediately begin excitedly plotting life beyond parental restraint. We work various jobs hoping to one day own our own business or ascend the top of the corporate ladder. We want to “be our own boss.” When one church applies pressure we don’t like, it’s easy to find another down the street.
At the very least, we tend to relegate submission to the early stages of life, and there’s certainly an appropriate process of maturity wherein the nature of submission changes as we grow up. We rightly see a problem, for example, when a healthy twenty-five-year-old continues to take orders from his parents because he’s still living in their home and depending on their income. As we grow up, submission ought to look different. A fifty-year-old under authority is not the same as a twelve-year-old. But should it disappear altogether? Is it good for us to graduate completely from submission to authority?
I’ll show my cards. I do not believe it’s wise for any human being, at any life stage, to live completely free from life-on-life submission to authority. Whether it’s a pastor, spouse, friend, or mentor, we all need at least one person in our lives who has the authority to deny us our desires.
We live in an age of scandal. As an American evangelical (whatever than means these days), I often think to myself after another high-profile pastor falls, “I wonder who will be next.” Because of human sin and deceit, I don’t believe there’s a fool-proof way to completely eliminate such scandals. However, I often wonder if the fallen pastors I read about genuinely had authority in their lives. Sure, many of them presided within a “plurality of elders.” But authority on paper isn’t the same thing as authority in practice. Did these fallen pastors submit their lives to anyone? Would they have listened if someone told them, “That aspect of your life is problematic and you need to change.”
I’ve been the lead pastor of my church, which started as a church plant, for nearly a decade now. When we first started, our church plant was part of a larger church that sent me and several other families to plant. I was the only local pastor at the church plant, but I was still part of the sending church and under the authority of the pastors of that church who were ultimately under the authority of the church. However, for the past three years, our church plant has been autonomous. As we became our own church, we ordained two other pastors to serve with me so that I wouldn’t be the only pastor. For a variety of reasons, we believe that a plurality of pastors is the wisest approach.
However, there was still a problem. The two pastors that joined me were men I had mentored and pastored for several years. I am older than both and further along in life and ministry. Both looked up to me as a mentor before joining me as pastors. So, theoretically, we had a plurality of pastors, but practically, we were in danger of functioning as a hierarchy with me at the top.
For the past three years, I’ve faced a personal dilemma. I know I need personal day-to-day authority in my life. However, I also know that the other two pastors look to me as a leader and would probably hesitate to oppose me. It’s tempting to move forward under the banner of pastor plurality while enjoying the privilege of single pastor prominence.
Recently, the three of us met to discuss our authority structure going forward and decided to clarify the “veto” power we all share over any one of us. In other words, if any two of us disagree with the decision of the third, we have the authority to veto the decision. Further, if any two of us believe confrontation of a third is necessary, we’ve given the others permission to bring it. As alluring as it is to sit alone at the top, we collectively agree that we each need real authority in our lives. None of us are qualified to play the role of Frodo and bear the ring of power alone. For the health of our church and ourselves, we must share the privileged burden of authority entrusted to us by the church.
What about you? Have you eliminated submission to authority from your life? Does anyone have veto power over your decisions?